My Sweet Father. My Dear Family.

We lost our sweet father on Saturday.  He passed away doing what he loved and surrounded by people that he loved, but it was very unexpected.  My family has been embraced with such warmth and love with his loss.  My family is coping.  Taking a minute at a time, wondering when this gets easier.  Thank you all for all the love and support. My family needs the love so much at this time.

Gone fishin'

Mike's always loved fishing, but has gotten into it more in the last month because of Gabe Miles.  So, Monday, our two little families went fishing at a new pond in A.F.   At first, they were catching a bunch of little fish that we kept them in June's bucket for her entertainment.  Finally, towards the end of our trip, Mike and Melissa both reeled in something a little more impressive.   

I've been wanting Mike to bring home a catch so that I could try fish a little more often, to decide if I like eating it.  I didn't realize that I'd be cooking it in its recognizable fish form.  So, as I was cooking it on our little grill outside, June was watching and caught a glimpse and instantly knew what it was.  Fish!   I have no idea if she realized the head was gone, or what I was doing to it, so I quickly closed up the foil, agreed with her on what it was, then moved onto the rest of dinner preparation.  While eating dinner, she knew the fish was in the foil and kept pointing and saying fish.  Mike pulled the meet off and I gave June a little piece and that's when I think the confusion set in.  She wouldn't eat it.  It was no longer recognizable, and looked just like a little bite of chicken.  She had the little piece of meat on her plate forever, I think she wanted it there.  She knew where it came from, and treasured it for that, so she couldn't imagine eating it, but she wasn't sad at all.  When she didn't know that I was feeding her fish, she ate it right up, it was just that little piece on her plate that she kept on eye on.

 I wish I could know what she was thinking.  This whole things sounds a little morbid and traumatic, I promise it wasn't. 

A little time with our families

Last week Dessa was in town and June and I both LOVED it.  She was a huge help with June and it fun just to get to spend time with her.

Friday we drive down to Vegas for Sydney's wedding.  We had a great breakfast with my family, then spent the afternoon swimming with Mike's until it was time for the wedding.  June loves all her cousins. 

No more binkies!

I was starting to get frustrated that June thought she needed her binky 24/7,  that it could start to affect her teeth and that she's was starting to look too old for it.  So last week I had June give all her binkies to our friend Baby Brox (Thanks for the idea Lindsay).  I don't know if cold turkey is the correct parenting approach for weaning off the binky, but it seemed to be what I needed to get it done and to stick to it.  She asked for it constantly at first, but not really any more, 5 days later.  The hardest part of this has been getting her to sleep and nap.  Our routine has been for me to hold her at nap time for a few minutes until she zonks out, then at night she's an angel and I just lay her down.  Now though, she's not settling down on her own, she goes to sleep 1-2 hours later than normal for naps and bedtime, and wakes up an hour earlier in the mornings.  She's been a lot more emotional and I hate hearing her cry as she tries to settle to sleep at night.  Yesterday, I resorted to taking her on a walk to get her to nap, so today I just decided to not try so hard and I'd just wait for her to be ready on her own.  Within a minute of her deciding she was tired, she laid on the couch, closed her eyes, rolled once or twice and ended up alseep like this...

June's always been pretty active and never sleeps as much as our friends' kids seem to.  So I don't know it it's a phase or if She's just going to end up being one energetic and headstrong little lady.  

She's AWESOME!

Ash Wood threw us an amazing little lunch party yesterday.  We all arrived in awe and couldn't believe all that she had done- things like treats baskets on the back of the chairs, yummy and completely homemade foods, fancy settings, decor and even a little gift for each of us.  We all felt so special and loved and Ash really needs to start a party planning and catering blog/business.  I'd hire her!

Cruisin'

Baptism, Shower and Death

How's that for a headline/ teaser?
About a month ago we went down to Henderson with Mike's family for Mason baptism.  June had a blast with her cousins and those boys adore her and are so tender with her, which not the usual for those boys :)  They loved having a girl around.

Mason showing of his iphone skills. 

Can you tell where June learned to point?  

Mike and his family headed back to Utah, but June and I stayed to spend time with my fam and throw Dia a shower.  Secretly, I made a goal this year was to throw a party.  I didn't have anything in mind when I made that goal, I just knew that I hate the awkwardness of being in front of people, but loved the idea of planning, decorating and having a good time.  My whole family has this fear of attention and awkward settings, especially when you feel like you're asking people to come give you attention and gifts.  So instead of the traditional games , I stole ideas from out friends' holiday parties where we played lots of mini challenge games.  Then  Dia played the guess right-or- chew-gum game with the newly wed game questions in order to open presents.  I might have over thought it and cared too much, especially the bubble gum ball necklaces, but I didn't want anyone to go home empty handed and I wanted the guest to leave immpressed.  I felt like it was a big success.

June and Hazel playing nicely, for now.

Dia's teaching the girls her best dance moves.

Papa Ken playing with June underneath the trampoline

The last day I was there with my family was quite somber.  It wasn't the best note to end one, but I was glad to be there and see the tender side of my dad.  Their dog, K8 (yes, that's right, said "Kate," a pun on K-9) has been pretty sick for a while now.  She was expected to go a very long time ago, but had endured and possible temporarily healed due to much prayer on my little brother's behalf.  But now, it was time.  My mom had been telling my dad that it was time for days now, but maybe it took him some time to mentally prepare.  He took Friday off to spend with June and me, but it ended up being a better time for him to give K8 the attention she needed.  With our first dog, we didn't know until later that my dad took her on a hike, shot her and burried her in the mountains but he didn't have the heart to do that again and he couldn't handle her being "disposed of."  So, Dad and our dear neighbor, Skip, dug a hole. (Skip and Roberta have been like co-owners to K8).

After the hole was done, Dad and the little girls played for a bit, had some lunch and said goodbyes.  (Dad didn't want to get to the vet and then have to wait for them to return from lunch, so he was waiting to take her in)  The whole day, Delyse and I kept tearing up, sad for my dad.  Introspectively, this was a new experience for me, to see death coming and to ponder it and grasp the reality and finality of it and to share this with my family- athough I'm sure it's a lot easier with a dog than a close friend.  We don't share too many tender and vulnerable moments with each other (or maybe I just never have).  I really had no bond to this dog, only the empathy for my family.  

I made this headstone for my dad.  At the time, I thought it would lighten the mood,
but maybe later they'll laugh at my joke- she was pretty notorious.

With the much needed support of Roberta, my dad took K8 to be put down.  Delyse and I kept busy at home with the girls.  I was upstairs when my dad came in from the backyard and I could hear his breathing.  I came down to be with him and my sisters and he said little, but that it was a lot harder than he expected.  I can't imagine watching your dog go, bring her home, then drop the first few shovel-fulls of dirt into the hole.  

A little bit later, the rest of may family was home from work and school.  Dessa came in crying while Mom was filling Dane in will the news.  Dane came in quiet and reserved.  He didn't seem to acknowledge it.  A few minutes later he grabbed his scriptures and said that he's forgotten to read for the day.  Still, no sign of emotion.   It wasn't until later that I saw his facebook status, "3 words, worst day ever".  My heart broke for him.  Dia told me later that he had slept with K8 (probably cuddled up with her) every single night for forever.  I was sad for him to go to bed that night.  He may not have gotten to say goodbye, but did that make it easier for him?  I'll have to ask sometime.  

Sorry this post ended so depressingly, but it is ones of  the defining moments for me to remember with my family, all who I love. 

The Holidays (1 of 4 new posts)

Our tree at home.

Dancing to the Christmas music.

Christmas morning.

Playing at Hazel's.

Playing at Domina's

Snow Day